Just Get Over It.
I have a confession to make. I have been feeling sorry for myself lately. And when I'm not feeling sorry for myself I'm day dreaming. So why, you may ask, am feeling sorry for myself? Because I need a break. I desperately want to go on a date with my husband. I want to use a gift certificate (we received when Baby A was born!) for a restaurant and go to a movie. Is that really too much to ask for? I don't really think so.
My sister was going to look after A for us a couple of weekends ago but then she had to back out. She's in the process of selling her house which means a lot of work cleaning, organizing, packing and tidying. Babies just aren't very helpful when it comes to that sort of thing. I should know. My house wouldn't be in any condition to be shown to potential buyers at the moment.
Also, it's summer. Everyone is busy holidaying and the like. No one has time for looking after babies. My mom is still recovering from her surgery. She is home now and another sister of mine is visiting from out of town. I have been running back and forth to visit her and my mom. It is so warm in our house unless I want to hang out in our bedroom where the air conditioning unit is. It's been working extra hard lately and has started making a few strange noises which I find very difficult to ignore when trying to get to sleep. Last night it seemed like it took me an hour before I fell asleep and then I woke up again two hours later to the same funny noises. Then I became paranoid that it was going to just quit. Then I worried about the money it would cost to get another one. I ended up shutting it off. By morning it was a tad stuffy in our room.
And the day dreaming? I've been imagining Peter and I going on dates again when Miss A is older. Thinking about how much easier everything will be. How much more freedom I'll have. So much more time on my hands. How much saner I will be. But after I day dream a while the guilt washes in like the tide. How can I wish my baby's infant hood away? How can I be so selfish when I was the one who chose to bring her into this world in the first place? Suck it up lady, it's not going to last forever.
Ahem. So you see, I'm rather busy. It's very time consuming to go through so many emotions in such a short amount of time. To argue with myself. And the worst part is? I'm so stubborn, I'll never win.
10 comments:
You know, I don't think you SHOULD have to rationalize leaving your child for a FEW hours to help rejuvinate your own soul!! I mean, before you were Mama D, you were someone else...heck, you were Peter's love! You deserve to take a break, and go out, enjoy yourself, and NOT feel guilty over it. If I was there I would definately TAKE baby A away from you, and FORCE you to have some adult time! It's good for you, and it's good for her to have happy parents! See if you can find a young teenager in your area, who goes to your church, or a friend's daughter or babysitter.
I hope you get what you want, and that you don't feel the guilt that comes with it! :)
What are you doing tomorrow night? I have no plans yet. C and baby A... hangin'. Sounds like a good way to spend the night.
And if she screams her head off, I'll call my mom for back-up! :]
No, seriously. I'm not doing anything. CALL ME.
I am camping on the weekend, so if tomorrow doesn't work for you, then any time next week is good.
There is nothing wrong at all for wanting to have some time just you and Peter. It is good for the both of you to get out and have adult conversations with out having to worry about the baby. You guys just need to get away for a while, and there is no reason to feel guilty about it!
Don't feel guilty. ALL parents need to get away for a little bit. It gives us a chance to sigh, relax, and recharge. Hang in there.
*hugs*
I could have written this post. I feel for ya, hang in there! Adult time is fun and deserved and hopefully coming soon to a theater near you...
You are not alone, Mama D, you are not alone.
You certainly aren't alone! I want to go on a date with my hubby too. And I want it to end at home with some romance. . . We have to pay a babysitter and that is insanely expensive, but since it's at our house the romance gets cut short. Bah!
I've told you before, I'd be happy to look after the little one for you anytime. I used to be quite the in demand babysitter back in the day. Anytime you need, just give me a call.
My man and I have not been out together, just the two of us, since our wee snappers birth 9 months ago. We are moving to Australia in 5 weeks and I'm totally taking him out for beers like the second or third night (the husband, that is, not the baby). We're staying with my mum and little does she know that she'll be babysitting every free moment she has....
Actually, I say this but I'll probably remain the nana I am and take ages to actually go out on a proper date!
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