Pump

Todays blog is dedicated to those of us moms who have ever experienced the pump. You know what I mean. The breast pump. I myself, was not prepared for it. When I was expecting I read many books. Pumping was mentioned. I never paid much attention, because I wouldn't need to pump. My breasts would be fine. My baby would be fine. My milk would be super fine. It would all be fine. Only it wasn't.

In regards to my breasts, (please god don't let all the perverts find me because I'm talking about this) they are rather large. I have heard people complain before about their breasts being big. I don't like to go around saying "No, seriously, you're not that big." I am an H. For those of you who didn't know bra sizes go up that high, they do. I'm just thankfull I'm not a Z. Yet. So when I say big, I'm not exaggerating. Now you know. Needless to say, I hate them. My only consolation was thinking that they would be great for providing nourishment to my child. Turns out they are mostly great for suffocating her. That's right friends, I had to hold back part of my breast with my thumb so as not to smother her. The upside? I have tremendously strong thumbs. Other things you don't find out until you try to breastfeed. My nipples are (were) flat. What good are enormous boobs with flat nipples? I'm a freak of nature. These things made breastfeeding a sleepy, jaundiced, clueless baby even more difficult.

That takes us to the next point. My baby. She was not fine. She had something called ABO Blood Incompatibility. I encourage you to go to the link, it is interesting. Esentially, my blood made my baby sick. Therefore causing a series of problems one of which being unable to breastfeed well. I was totally prepared for breastfeeding to be difficult but not to this degree. I was still determined and was blessed to have really great people to support me. My Midwife and Noreen, my Lactation Consultant.

We have now reached the portion of this post regarding my milk and pumping. Hip hip hurray. Since my baby was not successfully breastfeeding I had to start pumping. I was told that once my milk supply actually came in she would likely be more interested. She was just too sleepy and weak to bother to work at getting my colostrum. Noreen took me to a special room on the maternity floor where the breastpumps were located. She explained to me how to attach all of my equipment. (I don't mean my equipment) I was so sleep deprived at this point I wasn't sure if I'd be able to do it myself the next time but I did. So, once we were set up we looked at the clock, attached the 'cups' and we were pumping. And pumping. And pumping. Hello, is there anything in there? Let me just say that I have helped on a dairy farm and the resemblance to cow milking is disturbing. I think I pumped five drops of colostrum that first time. I scraped every last drop I'd collected into my container as if it was liquid gold. I was depressed despite everyone's pats on the back. "Good job. Look at all that! Wow!" I must have been staring at everyone with a look that said "You are all nuts!" Sure enough though with frequent trips to the 'pumping room' I began to express more and more. It was hard not to be competitive. Comparing myself to other mom's in the room thinking, I'm sure I've pumped more than that. Or, feeling sad because I had never pumped that much. We fed Audrey whatever I pumped no matter what amount. I felt somewhat proud although I was dissapointed that she wasn't getting it the normal way.

After a week in the hospital we went home. I rented a Medela Lactina pump until I was able to get Baby A breastfeeding. I finally did so with the help of my midwives coming to my home twice a day for a week. The whole experience was not fun but well worth the fight. I am extremely proud of myself for sticking with it and I know that I am up for other challenges motherhood will bring. Since I am now back at work I have to pump again. I now use the Medela Harmony hand pump which is awesome. I guess I'll be pumping until Baby A is weaned. Pumping was never something I had planned on but it was something that was necessary for me. I am grateful that I was encouraged to keep trying no matter how big the obstacles seemed to be. For all you pumping Mama's out there, I know what you're going through. And in the end, it's well worth it!