Obsessions

I know I've written many posts and linked many videos about Twilight. But this a honest to goodness thoughtful and serious one.

This Saturday some of the cast visited Much Music for an hour long 'Twilight Special'. Being the devoted fan that I am, I tuned in. I have watched a few short videos of the casts public appearances. It's amusing at first, all the screaming, but it gets old fast. Which is why I've only ever watched the short videos. But this live appearance at Much was basically an hour long scream fest. It was, frankly, a bit much. I started feeling like a bit of a knob for watching it. Actually, I started feeling uncomfortable.

Here are these poor, drenched, freezing kids, who'd stood outside (some for TWO DAYS!) waiting for their chance to see the stars of this movie. Although it likely won't be followed up on I have absolutely no doubt that many of these kids will end up with pneumonia. They'll be sitting in the theater when the movie comes out, deathly ill, hacking their guts out, tears streaming down their faces because "OMG, it's just so beautiful!" (Right now being a fan kinda feels like getting caught playing Bratz dolls in your bedroom.)

It got me thinking about how I'd feel as a parent if my girls wanted to go and stand in the rain for two days to see something/someone they were obsessed with. Would I let them go? I want to say 'no way'. Peter says 'no way'. But the thing is I'm still young enough to be in touch with the 15 year old girl that I was. They girl who wore a gold band on my left ring finger and a single gold sleeper in my left ear so I could be like Robert Smith. Would I have stood in the rain for two days for the chance to meet him up close? Heck yeah. Would my mother have let me? I can safely say, no.

So how far is too far? At what point as a parent do you decide an 'interest' has become too intense? Can you do anything about it? I mean, obviously you can prevent them from spending two days in the rain and getting hypothermia but you can't control their thoughts. As I mentioned, I LOVED Robert Smith. I LOVED The Cure. Still do actually. Many times I sat in my room weeping over songs that I thought were so beautiful, so perfect. I had dozens of their posters plastered all over my wall. My obsession influenced my clothing, my jewelry, my hair color (not style ha ha!), my choice of alcohol. Did it hurt me? Well, I didn't go out on many dates but in the long term, no. I still love the band. I'm still a rather obsessive person (gasp! you're kidding!) but in a much more low key way. (yes, really.)

I don't think it's a bad thing to feel deeply about things. I do think that it's worth talking about. No one ever talked to me about why I felt so strongly about The Cure, or anything else I was crazy over. They just shook their heads, teased me or ignored it. I plan to do things differently. I'd like to know what my kids are passionate about and why. I'd like to have conversations with them about it. Perhaps sway them on things that I may not particularly be too happy about them loving. But I'll never be able to do that if I don't listen and really want to hear what they have to say.

So when the day comes that my girls are asking to do something outrageous because of their undying devotion to whatever I will seriously consider and weigh the pros and cons before laughing in their faces and saying "Absolutely not!"