Showing posts with label anger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anger. Show all posts

Thursday, June 11, 2009

I Yell

There are things we all do as parents that we aren't proud of. Things we try not to do. I yell. I don't like it. My kids don't like it (but it gets their attention which after all is the desired effect.)

Lately it feels like I've been yelling a lot. I think after a year of surviving sleep deprivation something has finally snapped. My body and mind have just said ENOUGH. I get frustrated ridiculously fast and next thing I know I'm shouting.

Yesterday I got thinking about my yelling and the impact it might be having on my kids. I'm sure there have been hundreds if not thousands of studies done on that very subject. I can guess that the findings are not positive. As it is, Miss A can often be found yelling "No!" at her sister to either keep her safe or to discourage her from touching Her toys. I ask her please not to yell and feel like a hypocrite.

Having said that I was thinking about all of the positive things that I/we are doing as parents. I was also thinking about the various things that parents do which can impact their children. To use one example, some parents can be incredibly soft, letting their kids get away with everything and/or coddling them. On the surface it may not seem as detrimental to their children as yelling however I believe it's impact can be just as harmful or worse.

Maybe I'm just trying to give myself an excuse to continue yelling but looking back at my own upbringing I know it wasn't the yelling that had the most negative impact on me. I will and do try my best to keep my voice even and calm. I know Miss A doesn't respond well to shouting and often responds with a loud "O-KAY!" And I'm often telling her to be mindful of her tone and the way she speaks to me and others. I know I need to do the same.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

*#@$ !

It is so totally unfair that less than five months after having Baby B, and in spite of the fact that I am exclusively nursing, my 'womanly gift' has returned. What the bleep?

It wouldn't be quite so bad if it didn't make me feel like a bag of crap. Like a bag of crap that can't stop crying over NOTHING.

It was the weirdest thing. On Saturday night after the kids were in bed and we were catching up on various television programs I was suddenly hit with a wave of dizziness and fatigue. Soon after I discovered the likely culprit and was absolutely disgusted.

I recall it came back when Miss A was around 7 months old and I was very upset and sent a worried email to Bon asking "Am I normal?" It seems everyone else I know gets at least a year out of the deal.

Why not me? Looking after two kids is challenging enough without being an emotional basket case and feeling so exhausted that you just want to lay around all day. All of this on the heels of going back to work. Sigh.

On the upside, I'm ready for Christmas. Oh. Except for the tree which is still naked. I'll see what I can do about that.